Apparently some nutjobs believe the the Rapture is coming at 6 p.m. on Saturday evening, followed by terrible earthquakes in New Zealand. I have preloaded a whole bunch of posts to Blogger, just in case I'm not around. In fact, this is one of them, set to go up at 6:01 p.m., Seoul time. (Get it? Soul time... ha ha!)
During the Rapture, naked people will float upward. Like this woman, Roberta Mancino, only in the opposite direction. For those watching, it will be a rapturous moment indeed. |
Hmm... before I decide not to pay my bills, I wonder what the Bible says about all this. Let's open it up and see.
Ah, here it is, in Matthew 24, verses 35 and 36...
"Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will not pass away. But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father alone."Oh, and 1 Thessalonians 5:2...
"For you yourselves know full well that the day of the Lord will come just like a thief in the night."My goodness. I guess it's a good thing I paid attention in church so I wouldn't be taken in by such heresy.
If you saw a whole bunch of people floating skyward like this, you're screwed. Really, really screwed. Get a zombie kit together pronto. |
UPDATE (May 21, 2011, 7:24 p.m. HST):
We're all still here.
Don't have a bible handy, but I believe there are some verses that somewhat contradict the above, or at least that's what I recall from a conversation with a person in Busan who belonged to a religious group that predicted the rapture in October of 1992.
ReplyDeleteAnd just recently I had a conversation about Revelations 1-3 (see below) with a missionary, who interpreted the verses to mean Jesus would come in the next 5-10 years. When I pointed out the original verse was written about 2000 years ago, meaning that the writer probably thought the end times would occur around 100 AD or so, he changed the subject. It takes a whole lot of stupid to take that book seriously.
"The revelation from Jesus Christ, which God gave him to show his servants what must soon take place. He made it known by sending his angel to his servant John, who testifies to everything he saw—that is, the word of God and the testimony of Jesus Christ. Blessed is the one who reads aloud the words of this prophecy, and blessed are those who hear it and take to heart what is written in it, because the time is near."