Monster Island (actually a peninsula)*

Pearls of witticism from 'Bo the Blogger: Kushibo's Korea blog... Kushibo-e Kibun... Now with Less kimchi, more nunchi. Random thoughts and commentary (and indiscernibly opaque humor) about selected social, political, economic, and health-related issues of the day affecting "foreans," Koreans, Korea and East Asia, along with the US, especially Hawaii, Orange County and the rest of California, plus anything else that is deemed worthy of discussion. Forza Corea!

Thursday, April 16, 2009

April 15 docket

Today is April 15. It is the 105th day of the year. After this, there are 260 more days in 2009. Sunrise in Honolulu is at 6:12 a.m., while sunset will be at 6:51 p.m. The moon is full and approaching its last quarter.

If you live in the United States, your taxes are due today. If you haven't filed them, don't worry, as there are millions of people failing to pay thanks to the economic downturn (Woo hoo! Silver lining!). The IRS will probably audit one of them first.

Today marks the first anniversary of Emma Watson being of legal age. She can Hermione me anytime.

Today also marks the birth of Great Leader Kim Ilsung. If he were alive today, North Koreans would be celebrating his 97th birthday. They'd also be freaked as sh¡t, because the Eternal President's been dead for fifteen years. Almost nobody comes back from that. Next month would mark the 35th anniversary of his giant neck goiter.

And finally, April 15, 2009, will go down in history as the date on which American conservatives embraced gay culture with parades and events across the country celebrating teabagging. It might be connected with Iowa and same-sex marriage, but I'm not sure.

4 comments:

UnknownThursday, April 16, 2009 10:48:00 PM
Wow, I have never seen a photo of Colonel Sanders without his beard. Who is that dude to the left, the hat looks east german or something.
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UnknownFriday, April 17, 2009 12:32:00 AM
Kinda sad to hear that Hermione is about to be introduced to the magic realm of cellulite, skipped periods, and misogynistic males.
If I was gay though I'd probably lick her out, she looks sweet.
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kushiboFriday, April 17, 2009 5:31:00 PM
emily wrote:
Wow, I have never seen a photo of Colonel Sanders without his beard. Who is that dude to the left, the hat looks east german or something.I wasn't sure who you were talking about at first with Colonel Sanders, but yeah, the Dear Leader does look like some sort of Eastern Bloc head of state.

Bloc head... ha ha, I crack myself up.
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kushiboFriday, April 17, 2009 5:34:00 PM
emily wrote:
Kinda sad to hear that Hermione is about to be introduced to the magic realm of cellulite, skipped periods, and misogynistic males.Well, that's not depressing. I don't get the skipped periods thing, though.

If I was gay though I'd probably lick her out, she looks sweet.Could you add a recent photo to your profile so I can, um, picture this a little more accurately?
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Ask Kushibo.

My Google/Blogspot data shows that a lot of the 2 million people who have landed on my site (yes, that's the real number) are looking for cultural information on Korea (e.g., “When did Syngman Rhee die?” “What did the Indians bring to the first Chusŏk?’ etc., etc.), as well as practical or historical stuff.

That got me thinking that, hey, I have a master’s degree in Korean studies and a minor in Japanese studies, I’ve lived in Seoul far longer than most foreans my age (whether they're kyopo or non-kyopo), I teach introductory courses on Korea and its cultural trappings and history, so why not offer a free service where I attempt to answer people’s questions, point them in the direction of where they can get them answered, and/or offer my regulars (that’s you!) a chance to take a stab at some of this stuff, too.

So if there’s something you’d like to know from a “contrarian scourge,” click on ASK KUSHIBO and just ask a succinct question in the comments section below.

Oh, and play nice. Please don’t make me regret this.

九十五大怪獣란? 쿠시보의 몬스터 아일랜드란?

Pearls of witticism from 'Bo the Blogger: Kushibo's Korea blog... Kushibo-e Kibun...
Now with Less kimchi, more nunchi. Random thoughts and commentary (and indiscernibly opaque humor) about selected social, political, economic, and health-related issues of the day affecting "foreans" ("foreigners" in Korea be they kyopo or non-kyopo), Koreans, Korea and East Asia, along with the US, especially Hawaii, Orange County, and the rest of California, plus anything else that is deemed worthy of discussion. Forza Corea!

* Monster Island (actually a peninsula)

The name of this blog comes from a line in "Lisa on Ice," a beloved episode of The Simpsons, perhaps my all-time favorite television show (even though for several seasons there, it really did suck). Lisa is imagining being sworn in as president, but at the last minute, it is discovered that she failed P.E. (physical education) and she is thus "sentenced to a lifetime of horror" on Monster Island. "Don't worry," the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court confides in her, "It's just a name."

Fast forward to Lisa and other prisoners running in panic through a tropical jungle, chased by Godzilla-like creatures, including a monster turtle and a monster firefly.

"He said it was just a name!" Lisa screams to the man next to her. While he, too, runs for his life, the unidentified man calmly says, "What he meant is that Monster Island is actually a peninsula."

Anyway, I thought in some ways that punchline summed up modern-day Korea in a nutshell. For many people—foreigners and Koreans—the ups and downs and everyday travails of the Republic of Korea make it as precarious as a Monster Island would be (and with the DMZ being the only land border, it really is like an island). But it actually is a peninsula. Okay, it made sense in my head.

So as you can see, despite the hits I get from people looking for Japanese tentacle porn, it has nothing to do with anything salacious as that.