I want my NBC!

Okay, I had briefly thought about foregoing my protest against the NFL for letting the Rams leave Orange County, but when I discovered today's Superbowl was on NBC, I knew it would all be for naught. 

You see, all stations in Hawaii have already made the switch to digital, two and a half weeks ago and about a month before the rest of the country, in order to preserve the nesting ground of the dark-rumped petrel (a non-hygienic-sounding bird if ever there was one). 

Great, no problem, I had long ago set up my $40 converter box for my DVD-R (digital video recorder) that I purchased through the government coupon program, and I had my EyeTV digital tuner all hooked up to my iMac. The problem? NBC's local affiliate, KHNL (channel 13), has an anemic signal from a broadcast antenna way over on the other end of the island (or so I was told on the phone last month). It's not like I live in a cave; I'm near Dole Street in Honolulu — about three miles as a crow flies from the center of the metropolis.

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I don't understand KHNL's affirmative action program for the geographically challenged, but it has me pissed off! Royally. NBC, ironically, was one of the few analog stations I was able to pick up before the switch, which was fine with me, because I was able to watch "The Office," "30 Rock," etc., without any problem. But now I'm left in the dark. 

Well, not literally in the dark, because where KHNL's analog reception used to be there is a Hawaiian shirt-clad Dale Payson telling anyone seeing his repeated-ad-nauseum seven-minute presentation that the problem is them the viewer and not the idiot broadcasting station that doesn't understand television signals do not pass through solid rock. (And I'm not so certain this will be resolved when they move their transmitter to higher ground on Palehua Ridge in the spring.)

This has prompted me to write a letter to KHNL, informing them of the problem and my displeasure that they haven't yet fixed it:

January 29, 2008

To Whom It May Concern at KHNL:

You are idiots, and you suck! Give me back my NBC! Oh, did I mention you're idiots?

Yours sincerely,

K. Ushibo

Now if only I can find a stamp.

Phht. In the meantime, I guess there's always Hulu.